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Literature
strawberryfields
the mousepad burns my finger
my eyes wont stop buzzing
this…
this contact high is still in me
strawberriesstrawberriesstrawberryfieldsforever
my knee twitches
noises seem louder
hallucinations are more frequent
out of body experiences
strawberriesstrawberriesstrawberryfieldsforever
fingers shaking
body vibrating
body heating
cant focus
strawberriesstrawberriesstrawberryfieldsforever
panic
high
panic
high
contact panic
contact high
cant blink
cant sleep
nothingnothingnothing
strawberriesstrawberriesstrawberryfieldsforever
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Literature
What Does Thanksgiving Mean?
Thanksgiving. 'Tis the season to be thankful, right? To spend time with family, eat lots of food and be jovial, right?
Wrong.
It might be cynical, but I've never taken a fancy to Thanksgiving. It seems to me that no one understands what the point to the holiday is. Everyone says they're thankful for this and for that, but are they really? Do they understand there are bigger things to be thankful for? Then again, what do I know of the stupid holiday? Mother and father always fought, uncle always gorged and ate half the food, and my grandparents were either drunk out of their minds or passed out on their mashed potato covered plate. No one was thankful for anything other than the one of two times a year the heating company didn't mind giving us heat and the fact there would always be more alcohol than usual. I can only say I haven't had the best of Thanksgivings.
But Demyx promised different for this year. he said he'd teach me the true meaning of thanksgiving and why it was a holiday ce
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Literature
It's Wedding Time
"Jesus, Max! Would you stop moving!" April laughed, sticking me with a pin. I laughed, holding as still as possible as she pinned my oversized vest to the back of my shirt. "You really should have gotten this taken in." She sighed, finally standing.
"In case you've forgotten, I've lived in Canada fro the last 2 years. It's kinda hard to have a suit tailored when it's in another country." I replied to her, standing in front of the floor-length mirror.
"We could have sent it to you. Would have been super easy." Keith said, walking in the room. "April, can you tie my tie for me? I'm right hopeless at it" She sighed and moved to stand in front of him.
I shook my head and headed out to the balcony overlooking Trafalgar Square. I breathed deeply, drinking in the mid-morning air. It would be one of my last moments alone before marrying James, the love of my life. It wasn't that I minded at all that I was marrying him, it was just the fact that everything was going to change, and I wasn't sure
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Literature
Days 20-23
Day 20
None due to travel.
Day 21
Flight was long. Slept a lot. Everyone got here ok, and Keith is being a dick as per usual.
Day 22
Only 2 days. J's looking pretty ready, and I feel insanely ready. It's so close I can almost taste it.
Day 23
Poor guy's hung over from the shot contest last night. Serves him right for doing 68 shots. I can hardly wait for this to be over, both the wedding and the no sex agreement. Tomorrow is but a dream...
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Literature
Days 15-19
Day 15
That bastard. Day in his boxers? Really? Really? That... That's just mean. But damn. DAMN he looked good.
Day 16
Huh. Turns out I passed my final with one of the highest marks in the class. That put me in a good mood. And then I begged him. Yeah... No. I wanna be married now.
Day 17
I hate those goddamn popsicles. He eats them much seductively. But we leave in 3 days. Packing and getting in touch with everyone should keep my mind off things.
Day 18
I kind of just lied to him about how I'm doing. That was really random, but whatever. The families are all set to go, now just to check in with my friends over there.
Day 19
We leave in less than 12 hours, and thank god for that. This flat is driving me up the bloody wall.
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Literature
Days 11-14
Day 11
Dear god he is torturing me. Egging me on and then denying me. He's enjoying this way too much. I am seriously not a fan of him right now.
Day 12
I think I may have just bombed my final. Everyone said I did fine, but oh god. With all the extra rehearsals I thought we'd nailed it, but I completely froze. I blame J and his incessant need to tease me. I'm going to Auntie K's. Get away from him.
Day 13
My god, they're all bloody talking about the damn wedding. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty excited. But still. Shut up.
Day 14
So I've started talking to him again. Still not his biggest fan, but I talked to him. Poor kid thinks he failed his final at a 75. Heaven forbid. 10 more days, though.
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Literature
Days 5-10
Day 5
I hate him I hate him I hate him! Why the hell did I agree to this? Why? Why? Why!
Day 6
I've resorted to not coming home. Maybe if I don't see him I won't want to jump him. But the orchestra and band hate me… Too bad. They knew what they were signing up for. Sure, there's more practice than intended, but then we'll all be good. For showtime.
Day 7
Studying in silence. Fuu… I tried, I did. He just shot me down. Bastard.
Day 8
It's Monday, and no one loves me right now. Friday... Even she couldn't deal with me. I got sent home from work for fuck's sake. God, I need a drink.
Day 9
Miserable. Like I've got a massive cold. Spent the day at home. By myself. Nine days. Unprovoked. Fuck.
Day 10
I haven't talked to him yet. Hope his exam went well.
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Literature
Day 4
It's good he didn't freak out  or anything when I told him about mum. Not that thought he would or anything. I want him so bad, haven't completely lost it. And I don't intend to. Nope. I shall succeed.
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Literature
Secrets
We had just finished eating in pure silence. This whole no sex thing was driving me mad, even though I'd never admit it. I huffed and flopped down in a chair and picked up the daily news. After a few minutes of silence, I spoke. "Hey James?"
"Yeah?" James said, clearly waiting for me to beg that the 'no sex' thing needed to end.
I refused to give in and hid behind the paper. "Y'know how I said I didn't want to talk about what happened with my mom? Something tells me I should tell you."
"Oh." James said, surprised and a bit curious. "Of course, Max. You can tell me anything."
My face turned bright red. This was the first time I'd talked about it since the foster house had me seen. "I told you my mom wasn't right. She was generally pretty good, but when she snapped, she... She had a habit of beating me. Nothing really serious, but... Yeah... She was not at all right in the head." I breathed in deeply, afraid of what he'd say.
He stood and walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me,
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Literature
Day 3
Inhale. Exhale. It's only day three. I can do this. Besides, I've got exams coming up. Got to rehearse, right? Hopefully I'll get so busy I won't notice. There has been a moment or two, but I shall remain victorious.
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Literature
Day 2
Alright, day two, not so bad. I did make it the time he was at Cherry County without complaints. I did have prep days though. Mind you, that wasn't decided. More forced on us… But I can do it. Gotta have faith, faith, faith.
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Literature
Day 1
No sex for 24 days, till the honeymoon. Why the hell did I say that I'd do it? Does he hate me? Probably. Will it be worth it? Definitely. Day 1 down, 23 to go. I give him a week before he cracks.
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Literature
Obvious
"Hey, Demyx. Axel send you out shopping again?" I asked as he came, well, fell  through the front door.
"Yeah." He panted, setting the stuff down. "Why did he need me to get it? He's  not meeting Roxas for like an hour. He had loads of time to do it." He sighed,  flopping onto the couch beside me. He looked up, his mullet slightly skewed.  "How are you?"
I smiled, fixing it slightly. "Very good, thank you." He smiled widely, all teeth. "But I  do have a question for you."
"Okay…" He responded curiously, turning his body completely to face me.
"Do you want to go for ice cream?"
His eyes lit up. "Can we?" I laughed, telling him we could as he scrambled to put his  shoes back on. "Letsgoletsgoletsgo." He rushed, dragging me out the door and down  the stairs. I laughed, letting him guide me.
The ice cream parlour was only 3 blocks from his and Axel's apartment, so, naturally, He ran the whole way there. I chuckled,
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Literature
Melody
I heard him playing every night. There was something about the way it sounded that  drew him to it initially those 5 months ago. The soft, rhythmic melody droning out  the noise of the others: Axel's loud sexual escapades, Vexen's small explosions, Marluxia and Larxene's laughter. The sounds that bothered me so much, but no one would change no matter how much I asked.
Every night I'd slip over to his room three doors over from mine and sit outside it, whatever book I happened to be reading in hand. Every night he started with the same song; the same re-mi-fa scale. Every night my breath slowed, my mind clearing more than usual. Every night he'd play a new piece that would fit exactly with the section I was reading.
Not a month after I started this habit did I stop bringing a book and just sit and listen. My eyes would drift closed and my head would rest against his door and my foot would tap along to the beat. I would sit there and he would play, anywhere from half
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Literature
Happy Birthday Max
We sat on the bench overlooking the pond we had once skated on four months ago. It was so peaceful, the ducks teaching the little ones the ways of the pond, the parents pushing their kids on swings, happy couples walking about. There was a light breeze, the smell of salt hinted on it. It complemented the sun bou-
Smack. "Max, are you even paying attention?"
I looked down, James' head resting in my crossed legs. "Sorry, what?"
He sighed, smiling. "Never mind." He took my wrists and examined them thoroughly. "Those are quite the burn marks."
"If you hadn't bound me up so tight, or bound me at all, that never would have happened." I said, raising an eyebrow.
He smiled slyly. "But you liked it." I shrugged and nodded. I couldn't disagree with that. "So my efforts weren't floccinaucinihilipilificated then?"
I laughed. "Of course not." I leaned down and awkwardly kissed him. "Just try to be a little more gentle, yeah?"
"Yeah." He laughed and nodded. "Happy day after birthday, Max. I l
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Literature
Babies
I pulled the bottle out of the microwave and tested it on my wrist. After I was content with the temperature, I gave the bottle to Jonathon and popped my own food into the microwave. O bounced him on my hip, waiting for last night's dinner of potatoes and pork to heat up. When it was done, I sat on the couch and bounced him on my knee. I turned on Treehouse and slowly ate, keeping him balanced.
Max opened the door and I stood. "Hey Maxie." I gave him a quick kiss and patted and rubbed Jonathon's back.
"Hey love. How's i-" He froze, staring it at me.
"What's wrong?" I asked him curiously.
"Ba-baby?" He said, shocked.
I smiled. "Yeah. 9 months. Isn't he cute?" I giggled spinning around.
He stumbled over to a chair and flopped into it. "Why…? Who…? What…? When…?"
I looked at him, confused. "Take that again, love."
"He can't be… Ours?" His voice cracked.
I laughed. "Of course not. He's- hold on." I moved over to Jon's crib and laid him down, for he had fallen aslee
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MindFullOfCorruption
Taylor
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
Canada
So as it turns out, I'm a person. Believe it or not. I know, it's pretty hard, innit? It's even hard for me to believe. I've spent my life thinking I wasn't. Oh well. Life goes on. I'm hungry.

I just ruined the moment, didn't I? Damnit. The joys of being a distracted writer.
Interests

We Were Heroes Once.

Journal Entry: Thu Jan 19, 2012, 7:28 PM
Part One.
I do still exist. I do still write, just not in the same volume as I used to. Times have changed, people change. Don't sorry, times and people will change again, and I'll get back to writing and posting more. Just give it time.

Part Two.
Happy Christmas and New Years. I hope it was good for all of you folk and had good times with loved ones, and maybe even not so loved ones. I know it's late, but I've been busy, it being the season of finals and mass amounts of stress and all that.

Part Three.
THIS.

  • Listening to: That link up there.
  • Reading: Absolutely Nothing
  • Watching: Absolutely Nothing
  • Playing: Absolutely Nothing
  • Eating: Absolutely Nothing
  • Drinking: Absolutely Nothing

Journal History

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